To move to The Retirement Dream Home, we first had to sell our house.  The sale began with us signing an agreement with a real estate agent to sell our house.  The broker then became Professor Higgins. My wife and I were Eliza Doolittle. Professor Higgins was now about to instruct us in the proper preparation and packaging of our home.

She (working alone, not a part of one of those husband-wife tag team real estate brokers) began by walking through our home, poking about, nodding, and saying “Hmmm,” quite often.

After the tour, she sat us down and said something like, “The house has good bones, but needs a little work.” What that meant to me was “I think I can sell this dump, but only if you do exactly as I say.”

She, of course, recommended re-painting the walls, re-polishing the wood floors, and replacing the light fixtures.  These were mere starters.

Now it was “stuff” time.  “Stuff” being all furnishings and anything else that did not contribute to the house’s “visual appeal.”

“Couldn’t we move stuff to the garage and clean up?” we foolishly asked.  “No,” said the broker, “you have to get rid of most of this stuff so we can stage the house.”