From a recent Facebook post from my friend, Ed Decker:
Facebook keeps asking me “What’s on your mind, Ed? thought I would jot down a few things.
Went to see my cardiologist last month. He said I was in pretty bad shape. I told him I was as healthy as a horse. He nodded and said that it had to be a really old one that pulled a few too many wagons. Said that they shoot horses in my condition.
I donâ€™t want to say that I am old, but I realized a while ago that everything I buy now will outlive me. I now have that dreaded furniture disease….my chest is falling over the top of my drawers!
Back in time, long, long ago when I was actually doing something, I was kind of trying to look important. Back then, the status symbol was one of those pagers that everyone had clipped on. I couldnâ€™t afford one so I’m wore my garage door opener. Now I am puzzled because I donâ€™t remember having a garage back then.
Back then, my next door neighbor bought one of those new TVs that had a remote and spent the next month bragging about it to all the neighborhood. I went to the same store and bought a remote for his TV model. Every night I would sneak out and change his station. He did stop talking about it. Maybe thatâ€™s what I had clipped to my belt.
With my 85th birthday coming up this month, I got thinking about old age and decided that it is when you still have something on the ball but you are just too tired to bounce it. I thought about making a movie for folks my age and call it “Pumping Rust.”
I was filling out an application for a medical something I forget now. It asked who I want notified in case of an emergency. I wrote in . . A Good Doctor! The nurse told me my attitude was a bit out of whack. I told him Iâ€™d fix it if he could tell me what a whack was.
My wife remarked that I seem to be reading the Bible a whole lot more lately. I told her that I was cramming for my finals.
A while back, I went to the cemetery to put flowers on my motherâ€™s grave. My dadâ€™s grave is right next to hers. Instead of the usual â€œDear husband and fatherâ€ stuff, he had them write, â€œI told You I was sick.â€
I just spent ten minutes looking at the word, cemetery. Who ever invented that. Strange word. One dictionary called it â€œPlace of the dead.â€ Very unnerving, but then, you are usually dead when you are placed there.
Our church back home had a graveyard next to it. At least that is easy to understand. I looked this subject up on the web and found this:
“place set aside for burial of the dead,” late 14c., from Old French cimetiere “graveyard” (12c.), from Medieval Latin cemeterium, Late Latin coemeterium, from Greek koimeterion “sleeping place, dormitory,” from koiman “to put to sleep,” keimai “I lie down,” from PIE root *kei- (1) “to lie,” also forming words for “bed, couch.”
Wow! Who knew? Who cares, besides me?
We have been in lockdown since the first week of March and I have gained 8 pounds. My wife is now insisting that I wear the mask inside. She said itâ€™s to keep me from eating all day long.
She came into the study yesterday and asked what I was laughing about so loudly. I told her I had just told myself a joke. She asked, â€œThen why were you laughing so hard?â€ I told that I hadnâ€™t heard that one before.
I have been talking to myself more than usual lately. My wife said it doesnâ€™t bother her so much until I get into an argument.
One of my sons thought it would be a nice gesture to install a fountain just outside the window in my study. It looks beautiful and I look at it every 10 minutes as I race to the bathroom. At least I am dropping some of that weight.
Well, I gotta run.
Obviously, I have too much time on my hands.